motivational speaker having a stroke in all-caps desperation
TOUCH-GRASS-ENERGY✕REMOVE FILTER
spiritual influencer discovers thesaurus, immediately regrets it
guy discovered nature exists, thinks it's a personality trait
pepe discovers grass is actually a deep state psyop, files 47-page manifesto
We just want basic needs but make it viral despair
unhinged biohacker discovers that normal people are NPCs
Mikli (via @wttp3)•
breaking: someone discovers sedentary people exist, shocked
` (via @wttp3)•
Jeff Goldblum's unsolicited dating advice hidden in a Sega CD game
SLOP+ By AlphaFox (via @wttp3)
Some absolute legend at Sega decided to weaponize Jeff Goldblum's chaotic energy into a bizarre PSA disguised as video game content, telling gamers to...
grandma smells like death, actually
hoeflator/滥交师傅 (Yishun Kampung mode) (via @wttp3)•
Unhinged relationship take masked as social commentary
Ames™ (via @wttp3)•
bro thinks he cracked the code on women but really just cracked
Jean-François Gariépy (via @wttp3)•
Japanese psychotherapy but make it backwards clothes energy
KD$ign (via @wttp3)•
Author goes full steampunk hermit, touches zero grass, writes manifesto
mom's big break, son's big break-down
Tebatso (via @wttp3)•
buy-one-get-one-free existential crisis disguised as grocery promo
Birthday boy seeks 'anomalous women' via Facebook; autocorrect takes the fall
brush or perish: a digital fever dream about oral hygiene and mortality
Peak slop: CIA mk-ultra but make it celebrity clinic gossip
psilocybin as substitute for actual introspection, a reddit dissertation
Taylor Sterling (via @wttp3)•
vegan meditation speedrun any% no-romance world record
Peak internet degeneracy: confusing sexual orientation with proctology
streamer can't fathom normal people existing without ad revenue
Autism Capital (via @wttp3)•
Guardian asks real questions about imaginary phone royalty drama
parent screams about stress while creating stress, tells kid to 'get some standing'
trying real hard not to care about thing while publicly caring about thing
Sleaford Mods (via @wttp3)•
bro really thought we wouldn't judge him for this one
Guy Martin speedruns democratic participation by doing it zero times
broke the social interaction speedrun by confusing Tiger Woods with stocks
vx-underground (via @wttp3)•
desk jockey doomposting about desk jockeys having no future
Ryan Rich (via @wttp3)•
just legalize addiction, what could go wrong
robert johnson (via @wttp3)•
guy discovers shower and basic hygiene doesn't magically summon soulmate
weed is on a semi hiatus shut up (via @wttp3)•
species.exe has stopped responding, recommends uninstall
alistair green (via @wttp3)•
five year thesis vs one hiking trip speedrun
Andrew Quinn (via @wttp3)•
Discord bad, kissing your homies good actually
@endingstart_ (via @wttp3)•
Deeply unhinged sensory description with a side of lazy stereotyping
Eve (via @wttp3)•
naked man's manifesto: typos, vibes, and resentment toward loud offspring
gta michael (via @wttp3)•
guy discovers sobriety has side effects, immediately regrets it
queefcafe (via @wttp3)•
Unhinged political flowchart hits different when you add lizard-people energy
Tabloid speedruns 'worst possible headline writing' with unhinged adjectives
bro really said 'one to miss' like he's reviewing a Netflix show
james from bexley (via @wttp3)•
Billionaire lectures remote workers on morality from his rocket company
ELON CLIPS (via @wttp3)•
Hot girl summer reads books by water, science hates her
Millennial discovers self-care, compares it to WWII, somehow thinks that's profound
Gen Z retirement home: where you go to pretend work doesn't exist
Big Bird's gardening arc too real for corporate mediocrity
Shakespeare didn't die for this, yet here we are
Broke expats in white linens aren't enlightened, just unemployed with better WiFi
Someone's BBQ prep went catastrophically, hilariously wrong
build back asylums, because homelessness is just bad vibes
Insider Paper (via @wttp3)•
