Hemorrhaging organs while producing mediocre knock-knock jokes: peak show business

“My movie screen name is Boris Boogeyman, but you probably know me better as Boris Boozniak. I’m actually not even a real movie star. I’m the executive producer of knock-knock jokes. I want my jokes to make people say ‘Maybe this isn’t the best use of my time.’ Personally, I can’t stand the taste of food. And to make matters worse, I’m hemorrhaging vital organs right now. But that’s show business, baby!”