ziplock nipples and existential belly button theory

A deranged manifesto from someone convinced they're a benevolent chaos agent who 'gunks up' people's boyfriends while exposing their rib cage. The content oscillates between aggressive posturing and nonsensical word salad ("HUMBLESTAR BROOM RIDERS STAY REALMOVING"), delivered with the confidence of a street preacher who just discovered a new personality dimension. This is what happens when someone mistakes the inside of their own brain for the outside world and decides to broadcast it at full volume.