Guardian columnist discovers women exist in multiple forms, accidentally invents paradox

A Guardian opinion piece does the intellectual equivalent of pointing at two women and asking 'but HOW do clothes work?' as if dressing for self-expression versus dressing for male approval exists on some binary axis that newspapers are uniquely positioned to arbitrate. The author has constructed a false dichotomy so aggressively specific it loops back around to being entertainingly pointless—watching someone earnestly debate which female performer is ideologically correct based on hemline length never gets old.