VICE discovers phones exist, headlines accordingly unhinged

VICE once again manufactures generational anxiety by taking a dubiously-sourced survey and weaponizing it into a moral panic about Gen Z's reproductive prospects. The headline 'Why Can't Gen Z Get Laid?' frames basic smartphone addiction as an existential sex crisis, complete with ominous branding ('The Great Unwanting') that makes doomscrolling sound like a biblical plague. This is what happens when media outlets mistake a self-growth app's engagement metrics for sociological revelation.