Peak British self-parody: five lunges and umbrella twirling equals absolute madlad energy

I’ve had a cup of tea. I’ve clapped my hands and said “right then”. I’ve said “let’s get this show on the road”. I’ve put the bin out and even patted the lid before going back inside. I did some exercise (five whole lunges, hands on hips), and yes - I’m raring to go and already nailing the day! I’m in the mood for a properly wild one, actually. Later, I hope to loudly and clearly tell someone with a clipboard in the street, “Not today, thank you!” I might buy a small item in a shop and, when offered an unnecessary paper receipt, cheerfully declare, “Yes, go on then, why not!” I might even randomly tack “sir” onto the end of “after you” while jovially insisting a stranger goes through a door before me. Maybe I’ll take my umbrella with me and twirl it like a cane! The possibilities are endless!