Available for pickup, DM to arrange, absolutely unhinged

A selfie of a woman in a gray sports tank top with blue pom-pom earrings, smiling at the camera in what appears to be a bedroom setting. The image has a video play button overlay. The caption above is a humorous listing-style post suggesting the item (possibly herself or something she's offering) is suitable for all ages, will last 7 years but be used sooner, and available on a first-come-first-serve basis with comment instructions.